If You Break, I Won't Forgive You
by Tonbokiri
Summary: *In no way related to the Katsugeki or Hanamaru series - Having been attacked by an Ootachi, Nagasone is in grave danger of being broken, thinking fast Yagen manages to stabilize his condition until they reach the Citadel. With Urashima in a panic over his condition and Haschisuka no where to be seen it seems Saniwa and the Touken Danshi are in for a long night.


**_If You Break, I Won't Forgive You_**

* * *

 _*In no way related to the Katsugeki or Hanamaru series - Having been attacked by an Ootachi, Nagasone is in grave danger of being broken, thinking fast Yagen manages to stabilize his condition until they reach the Citadel. With Urashima in a panic over his condition and Haschisuka no where to be seen it seems Saniwa and the Touken Danshi are in for a long night._

* * *

"Nagasone-nii-chan!" Urashima yelled out as the man collapsed to the ground Tonbokiri and Sengo covering for him and taking out the Ootachi with a swift but lethal attack. "Yagen-dono! Please care for Nagasone-dono."

"Nagasone!" Kashuu ran to his side after taking care of his enemies moving to guard the rear Tonbokiri and Sengo sharing the front and sides as Yagen began to work on the wounded uchigatana his younger brother holding down on his wound as best he could to suppress the blood loss feeling the warmth slowly draining from his body "Yagen! Help him!"

"You're not helping by being hysterical," Yagen frowned looking over the man and pulling aside his jacket carefully saw a clean cut stab wound through his lower left abdomen cuts and scrapes here and there covering his arms and legs. "I'll do what I can to supress the bleeding but he needs Taishou. Now."

"He won't break will he?" Muramasa came over once all the enemies had been defeated standing near the great spear who placed a hand on his shoulder Kashuu choosing to kneel beside the wakizashi and, like Tonbokiri, placed a comforting hand on his shoulder announcing "We're returning to the Citadel."

"Yes!"

* * *

"Konnosuke-dono! We need Aruji-dono now!" Tonbokiri pleaded to the small fox and almost in the next instant Saniwa burst through the doors a stretcher in hand "Place him on here, Sengo and Tonbokiri help me wheel him to the repair room, Konnosuke have the materials ready for my arrival Yagen can I leave the rest to you?"

"Yes Taishou!"

"Nagasone-nii-chan.." Urashima cried watching the trio run to the repair room feeling Kashuu grab his arm hoisting him up "Let's get cleaned up before we hand in our report."

"I'll take care of everything else," Yagen and Kashuu shared nod at the same time. He'd take Urashima and Yagen would inform the Citadel of the current situation or more importantly Hachisuka. Tugging him forward a little "Come on Urashima, Aruji will take care of Nagasone believe in them."

"...Okay.."

* * *

After many hours of being in the infirmary, Saniwa emerged from it's doors a heavy sigh escaping their lips as they stared up at the full moon blood staining their once white robes. Nagasone was lucky to say the least. Had it not been for Yagen's and Urashima's quick thinking to suppress the blood loss he may have very well broken shortly after entering the infirmary.

 _'No time for that,'_ Saniwa shook their heads from such thoughts. Nagasone was in a comatose state but that didn't mean he was dead, wasn't _broken_. _'I need a bath first before I find his brothers.'_

"Aruji!" Urashima dashed into their arms as soon as the door slid open almost knocking them over in the process, quickly glancing around the room they found that only Kashuu was the only one in sight. Raising a confused brow at this Kashuu smiled standing and taking his leave to allow them some privacy. Grateful for this Saniwa ushered the wakizashi further into the room while still holding him close to their chest, sitting down his broken sobs stabbing their heart. Waiting until he calmed down Saniwa rubbed soothing circles on his back "Nagasone-san will be alright, he's in a coma but he's alive, the rest is up to him on whether he wakes up or not."

"Thank god.." Urashima broke down completely sobbing himself to sleep in minutes the exhaustion and anxiety having taken a toll on his body the comforting warmth of his master lulling him to sleep, Nagasone was alive. That's all that mattered. Saniwa knew that he loved Nagasone, even if he was a fake he never cared about it, about whether he was and authentic piece or not. He had hoped that someday Hachisuka would feel the same. Carefully placing the wakizashi to sleep on the futon he moved the hair string from his sunset coloured locks calling out in a soft voice "Konnosuke.."

"I am here Aruji-sama," The fox appeared almost immediately at the door padding to Saniwa and sitting at Urashima's side "I will watch over Urashima-sama, Hachisuka-sama is in the training hall."

"The training hall? At this hour?"

"It seems Urashima-sama isn't the only concerned about Nagasone-sama," Konnosuke replied with a shake of his head "Because of that, he has been a little snappy towards the other Touken Danshi."

"I will talk to him," Saniwa went to stand their vision blurring as they did stumbling backwards a few steps before regaining their balance leaning against the door for support. "You should be resting as well Aruji-sama!"

"I must go to Hachisuka-kun first," Saniwa took a few breaths to steady themselves standing straight once more in order to regain their composure "Then I promise I will rest."

"I will send Tomoegata-sama to come and get you in a while - to make sure you don't overexert yourself."

"The hour is late, let him sleep ." Saniwa smiled exiting the room and taking slow steps made their way down the hall before finally approaching the training hall the sound of _bokken_ smashing together echoing throughout the expansive hall grunts of anger and exhaustion coming to Saniwa's ears.

 _'He's not alone?'_ Sliding open the door a crack Saniwa peeked through to see Hachisuka and none other than Mutsunokami - his first Touken Danshi - sparring together, or they were at least, instead they had fallen to the ground breathing heavily from such an intense workout.

"Tell me Mutsunokami," Hachisuka huffed sitting up Mutsunokami splayed out on the floor beside him "Why join me?"

"You're frustrated about Nagasone's recent expedition aren't you?" He said more matter of fact than questioning noticing the change in the uchigatana's eyes. He and the former Shinsengumi sword didn't always see eye to eye - a trait the he and Hachisuka had in common. However, this time it wasn't about seeing eye to eye, Nagasone nearly broke himself saving Urashima and at nearly losing him, seeing how much blood was on Urashima when they came back it had left everyone shaken. Hachisuka was no exception.

"Of course I am," he admitted griting his teeth "The fool nearly broke himself protecting Urashima, did the idiot even think of the consequences? Or is he just doing this out of spite because of what I said the other day?"

"What happened?" Mutsunokami shuffled closer crossing his arms and legs to signal the other had his full attention. He thought that Saniwa would be resting, should be resting after what happened - especially after all that time in the infirmary. Little did the pair know that Saniwa was now wide awake having quietly crept in avoiding the creakiest floorboards with ease and placed themselves close enough to hear but far enough so that the pair couldn't feel their presence. They had Tsurumaru Kuninaga to thank for that.

"I told him...that he'd be better off broken, that he shouldn't exist for being a forgery." Hachisuka sighed covering his face with one hand "It was a petty argument and I went and said that to him in the heat of the moment and you know the worst part? He said nothing."

"If I were him, I guess I'd have the same reaction," Mutsunokami leaned back resting his hands to support himself "Nagasone can usually take a hit but I think you hit a sore spot this time. From what Yagen told us, Nagasone shielded Urashima from an Ootachi's attack. Since he had no time to defend the only option-"

"Was to take the full brunt of the attack..I know." Hachisuka finished frowning, a wave of guilt, fear and anger swirling around inside of him until he could no longer sit still. Training usually helped him in times like this and venting this off with Mutsunokami helped him even more. Not that he'd admit it.

"So?" He heard him ask seriously "What are you going to do? See him?"

"I'd be the last person he'd want to see now or ever for that matter." He huffed "Especially after what transpired a few days ago."

"Hey, the guy can take hits, he gets angry and all but he ain't the type to hold grudges, if he did he wouldn't even associate himself with you or Urashima am I right?"

"I can't argue there unfortunately," Hachisuka sighed in defeat. Mutsunokami had a point and it was true that no matter how many times he was harsh and called him names the uchigatana was always helping, always smiling. Now that the moment had come - that he might lose Nagasone for good..it scared him. "I suppose I could see him."

"You want me to ask Aruji to go with you?" The uchigatana smiled in understanding watching the other nod his head once grateful that he wouldn't have to say it. It was expected though, Mutsunokami was the first Touken Danshi summoned to the Citadel and he took care of everyone who needed help, even Izuminokami as much as they bickered with each other.

"Then why don't we head to his room now?" Saniwa clapped happily unable to keep themselves quiet any longer watching the pair jump in their place. Aruji was here? For how long? Hachisuka wanted to crawl into a hole.

"Um..Aruji, how long have you been sitting there?"

"Hm..." They tapped their chin "Since you stopped sparring?"

"That's the beginning then!" They both scolded them in unison when Saniwa laughed "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I planned on coming to talk to you but it seems Mutsunokami-kun beat me to it."

"I thought you'd be resting after what happened," the uchigatana sighed scratching the back of his head "So? How is he?"

"He's alive, in a coma but alive." Saniwa smiled watching the tension drop from Hachisuka's shoulders in relief "I will go with you to Nagasone-san's room if that will help Hachisuka-kun."

"You would?" He whispered "Even though you should be resting?"

"All of your well beings are my first priority, sleep can wait - emergencies cannot," Saniwa reasoned shuffling closer reaching out to grab his hands and squeezing encouragingly "When I see any one of you in distress it affects me as well. Go to him Hachisuka-kun, please."

"Alright.." The lavender haired man blushed standing together Saniwa still keeping a firm grip on his hand "You can let go of my hand Aruji."

"Not until we reach Nagasone-san's room, I don't want you to change your mind half way there."

"Hn.."

"Aruji got you there didn't they?" Mutsunokami grinned walking towards the door "Well, since I'm finished here I'm going to bed."

"Sweet dreams Mutsunokami-kun," Saniwa bid him a farewell turning their attention to Hachisuka "Now, it's your turn."

* * *

"We're here." Saniwa released their grip on the uchigatana. As predicted, Hachisuka tried to talk his way out of going to said uchigatana's room but to no avail. Thanks to Yamabushi and Doudanuki's harsh training regimen Saniwa was much stronger than he had anticipated "You first."

"You demon," Hachisuka glared as he walked past them a smug smile in place "Wipe that grin off your face."

"I'll try," Sliding open the door they were greeted with Nagasone's sleeping form his sword resting above his head most of his upper body covered in bandages. "He's.."

"Alive," Saniwa placed a hand to his back the warmth encouraging the man to step forward, then another until he sat at the man's side watching his chest rise and fall, the inhale and exhale of his breath "Thank you Aruji."

"It was not my efforts alone Hachisuka-kun," Saniwa smiled "Would you like me to stay?"

"No," The lavender haired man shook his head. He needed to be alone, now that he was here and having been told that he was in a comatose state, he needed this. This chance. "I'd like to be alone with him."

"I'll be in my room if you ever need me," With a final smile Saniwa stepped out sliding the door closed and made their way down to their room with a tired sigh turning the corner to lean against the wall, the exhaustion of the day's events finally taking a toll on their body.

"Aruji," they heard a soft voice call out to them as the man approached "I've come to get you."

"I told Konnosuke...to let you sleep," Saniwa collapsed expecting to fall on the ground when warm arms held them in a tight embrace silently holding them against his chest until they fell asleep "Forgive me for the trouble...Tomoegata-san.."

"It wasn't Konnosuke who sent me," The naginata whispered smiling when they fully relaxed against him now completely asleep.

"It was Mutsunokami."

* * *

"I thought if you ever broke, I'd be relieved that there was one less forgery out in the world," Hachisuka started his eyes glued to Nagasone's bandages. It nearly did happen..He nearly did..

 _'Come on!'_ His mind screamed _'Say it!'_

"Now that the moment has arrived.." Hachisuka felt his voice break turning his head away with clenched fists _'Keep going..'_

"Is this what Urashima meant? That you didn't need to be real Kotetsu to be called _'brother?'_ "

Of course at hearing no reply from the unconscious man Hachisuka laughed bitterly to himself. He felt like a coward, doing this while he was asleep. Wouldn't it be more meaningful if he was awake? It just wasn't in his nature to be so straightforward. He admired Nagasone for that.

Despite being called a fake and even he himself acknowledging that he was a forgery, Nagasone always stood proud, always fought for what was right - just like his former master, Kondou Isami.

Reluctantly, Hachisuka reached out touching Nagasone's hand with a gentle touch as if he was made of glass, that if he put anymore pressure into his touch that the man would break. He knew it was silly of him to think this way, but he couldn't help it, never had he seen Nagasone in such a vulnerable state - so fragile.

"Urashima say's he'll cook you some food when you wake up," He spoke softly returning to look at his bandages watching his chest rise and fall with each breath he took, shuffling a little closer and without thinking went to hold his hand more firmly just like Saniwa held his hand "Of course, Shokudaikiri and Kasen are helping him with it, more to keep an eye on him so he doesn't make a large mess like the last time."

It was odd really, for many years they hadn't spoken like this, or rather - he hadn't spoken like this and yet it felt so familiar like the time that he refused to talk to him just slipped through his fingers. He was talking to him and he enjoyed it, not that he'd ever admit it - to Urashima or Saniwa.

He continued to talk well into the night about everything, how he should apologize to everyone once he was awake, how Akashi volunteered to do his chores without Hotarumaru's motivation. Mostly though Hachisuka talked about time past, that they should spar together sometime, trivial things that he would've said given time but this expedition...it showed him that no matter mortal nor object, an end comes to all. It reminded him of when he'd talk to Juzumaru sometimes. How all earthly things come to an end. He was always calm, kind and like Nagasone, walked tall.

"Urashima is worried so hurry up and heal fake." Hachisuka squeezed with a tired yawn deciding he'd rest for a while before going back to where Urashima was _'Only for a while.'_

* * *

Morning broke and stirring in his sleep Nagasone woke up and very carefully, so as to be mindful of his injuries sat up. What greeted him was something he thought he'd never see in his entire life. It was Hachisuka laid out beside him, his hand still in his grip a light blanket over his sleeping form. Smiling, Nagasone decided to leave the man be lifting his head gently and putting his pillow underneath "Thanks Hachisuka."

"Mmm.." Mumbling he watched him turn releasing his hand to make himself more comfortable. At hearing his room door slide open Nagasone turned his gaze towards the door to see none other than Saniwa a tray of food for two in hand smiling at the lavenders sleeping form. Quietly stepping inside they placed the tray down on the uchigatana's lap "Welcome back, Nagasone-san."

"Thanks." The man nodded gratefully, thankful that he wouldn't have to make the long trek into the mess hall.

"I thought he'd be here," Saniwa laughed softly "When he wakes please give him his portion."

"Did you drag Hachisuka here to watch me?" The uchigatana joked trying to make light of the situation, when Saniwa shook their head though, Nagasone was immediately all ears "He came here on his own actually," Saniwa smiled "All he needed was a little push of encouragement."

"From you?"

"Not me," they shook their head "It was Mutsunokami-kun."

"Mutsunokami? He did?" Nagasone raised a brow in confusion eating his portion of food while listening intently to the events that had unfolded after he collapsed. Half of what Saniwa was telling him confused him. Hachisuka was snapping at others because of what had happened? Told people not to enter his room unless it was either Saniwa, Konnosuke, Urashima and lastly himself. It all seemed unreal.

"Thank you for telling me Aruji," Nagasone placed his chopsticks down a soft smile bending his lips as he glanced at Hachisuka "It helps."

"We'll keep this between us," Saniwa placed a finger to their lips with a wink "The main thing is that you recover as soon as possible. Kogarasumaru-sama is taking care of Urashima-kun so you don't need to worry. I'll send Yagen-kun to change your bandages and Ishikirimaru-sama to purify the room along with Juzumaru-dono for prayers of a good recovery."

"You don't have to-"

"I _want_ to," Saniwa cut him off softly standing to retreat back to the door "I'll also tell you another secret while the chance is here."

"Which is?"

" _If he breaks I won't forgive him.'_ "

"' _He?_ '" Nagasone raised a brow at the sentence, it was a odd way of saying it though not that he minded. "Me?"

"You," Saniwa confirmed looking to the lavender watching his ears turn red as he tried his best to look asleep _'So he was awake after all..'_

"Hu hu hu.. So Nagasone-kun is awake?" Sengo approached noticing Saniwa stand at the door a smile on their face. "Yes, let him rest Muramasa-san, he is still waking up."

"Too bad, I thought I'd be able to glance at his condition and inform everyone since his brother kept guarding the door until all of us were in bed," Sengo shook his head in amusement "Hu hu hu..he's truly cared for Nagasone-kun."

"I agree," Winking at Nagasone, Saniwa closed the door ushering the man away from the room leaving the pair to themselves once more.

"...You're awake aren't you Hachisuka?"

"How long have you known?"

"When Aruji winked at me," He placed the tray to the side watching the lavender haired man sit up slowly his back still facing the man "So now you know everything I assume?"

"More or less," Nagasone laughed softly reaching out and placing a hand on his shoulder squeezing softly "Thank you Hachisuka."

"...You're welcome," He turned his body to look at the man properly, his voice, the warmth spreading from his large hand. It was comforting. "Fake?"

"Hm?"

"I'm hungry."

"Good thing the food is still warm," releasing his grip on his shoulder Nagasone grabbed the tray of food placing it in front of Hachisuka "Eat up."

 _'Say it..'_ He felt his conscious shout in the back of his mind. Why was it so difficult to say? Seeing the other move to stand Hachisuka went to stop him his voice leaving him as he looked at Nagasone's back a joking tone coming from from lips "I'll let you eat alone, you probably don't want me to spoil your food right?"

"Stay still," he whispered holding a hand out to stop him from moving anymore "Stay here Nagasone."

"..Sure.."

Meanwhile a few rooms down, Saniwa and Urashima stood listening, hearing them talk quietly between themselves. It was awkward but it was an effort, a step towards the right direction.

"I think everything is going to be alright now Aruji."

"Me too Urashima-kun," They laughed softly ruffling his soft sunset hair "Me too."

* * *

 **The End**

 **Thank you for reading :)**


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